Thinking. It’s one of the things I do best. Honestly thinking is code word for analyzing and most often it’s over analyzing. However, for once, that’s not what I’m doing in this picture that was taken while I was on retreat in Gulf Shores last August. Which by the way, shout out to my sweet friend Meghann for being so thoughtful to take this picture of me. I truly appreciated it as I don’t always make it into pictures for some reason.
But no, over analyzing is not what I am doing in this picture … What I am doing is considering all the women that I have been on retreat with. They all seem to have the most amazing personalities, talents, and ideas. I find myself wanting to mimic all of them and their habits. I want to adopt their way of doing things because they seem, to me, to be so unique and creative in what they do. But I hear a soft warning from God.
I hear Him whisper that I am not to try and be them or copy them. He made them unique and anything that I do to try to recreate them will be a massive failure. I must develop myself. But I’m struggling.
I’m struggling to see the qualities in myself that I see in everyone else around me. I hear the words, “Why can’t I just be like everyone else?” that I whispered in my head for years growing up. I wasn’t like the kids that were in my school back then. Though now I am similar to the women around me, I am not exactly like them. If I am being honest, I feel sort of out of place. They appear light years ahead of me in their journeys. It leaves me feeling sort of behind. But that’s not true at all. I’m different. And I hear God whispering to me and guiding me to dig deep and embrace what is unique about me. He calls me a masterpiece and says that I am made in His image. These truths are beginning to settle in my spirit in this picture. This picture is the quiet evidence of a process that God taking me though. He’s peeling back the layers of what I call “me” and He’s healing each one.
I’m different. I’m unique. I’m a masterpiece.
I’m getting to know myself. Not the self that the world would have but the self that He created me to be. And I like her.
“God made you an original. Don’t be a copy.” Pastor Bobby Smith Journey Community Church
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